13 years ago, Miss P was consciously and orgasmically conceived within a loving marital relationship. I still remember that moment now and how beautiful it was. We had been married for about four months but had been together for over seven years, the time seemed perfect and having a baby was the natural next step for us.
I am naturally in tune with my womanly cycles and have been for many years. If you refuse synthetic birth control methods it isn't that difficult. You know exactly when you are ovulating and can feel and sense each stage along the way.
It is easy to be swept onto the band-waggon these days with regards to pregnancy and birth. Like so many areas of life the whole event has been prescribed, medicalized and opened up to commercialism. It's tough when it's going on all around you, but you don't have to follow 'sheep-style', you can do what you believe and follow your own path.
Follow your instinct.
Our bodies were created to reproduce, once the act of insemination has taken place we no longer have to do anything apart from trying to keep ourselves healthy (and even if you don't, the chances are you'll still have a healthy baby). Our amazing bodies do the rest without instruction. Even those of little intelligence can grow and give birth to healthy babies. It is truly a wonderful and amazing process.
Nature naturally created within us a mechanism that enables us to deal with the pain of labour. If left to our own devices we will not need pain relief, but will cope knowing that each contraction is a step closer to meeting your new baby.
Orgasm in - orgasm out
It breaks my heart when I watch programmes like 'One born every minute' when I see women strapped to machines and made to lie on their backs during labour, this is the most painful position to be in. Naturally women tend to want to squat or deliver on their hands and knees, makes sense when you think that gravity pulls down. No wonder the poor women are crying out. It doesn't have to be like this, we have a choice, although often this choice is taken from us and as first time mothers we are new and unfamiliar with what is happening to us so we put our trust in those around us. Years ago we would have lived in closer knit communities where the elders would have shared their birthing wisdom with us and been there to support us with what is right. We would have been surrounded by others who had tread the path before us who could help us and show us the way. These days families (in most cases) don't live close together and you walk the path alone.
Birthing naturally is such an empowering experience. I remember walking down the high street moments after leaving hospital and feeling in total admiration of every mother that had a child.
One of my good friends has birthed six children and ,many of those have been unassisted, meaning that she chose to stay at home during labour and has left things too late to call the midwife, by choice. All of her births
have been fine. Years ago this would have been the norm.
I have birthed three children now, all in the same little cottage hospital. I would have loved to have birthed at home but my husband was always put off by the smell! (Not something I have been aware of). I have always dreamt of birthing under a tree somewhere warm, where nature surrounds you and the fresh air fills you.
Each of my births has been with midwives present but with no pain relief. I feel truly blessed that it was possible to birth in this way.
I am probably at the end of my birthing road now being 40 and single, it has been a joyous road to travel and one which I would thoroughly recommend to others. Of course the journey doesn't end with birth....birth is just the beginning!
To my pregnant friends, good luck and feel empowered, YOU know what to do
Some books I recommend:
'The birth keepers - Reclaiming and ancient tradition' - Veronica Sophia Robinson (Author of 'The Mother Magazine').
'Birth withough violence' - Fredrick Leyboyer
'The good birth companion' - Nicole Croft (Nicole runs Buddhabellies, yoga in pregnancy classes in rural Oxfordshire).