Sunday, 28 April 2013

Who do you think you are?

It's an interesting question isn't it...we think we know who we are, but are we really true to ourselves and how do we appear to others?

The reason for blogging on this subject is because I have recently advanced into the world of 'dating'.
When you are in a long term relationship you bumble on along, content in life and secure. You take for granted the partnership you have, assuming (or perhaps not giving attention to the fact) that your partner will always be there. You share the responsibilities of life, of running a home etc etc. When that partnership dissolves for whatever reason, you have to re balance life...bluntly that's 'DIY' and it's not easy!

Back to dating.......

So it seems there are many options open to the single woman...(or man of course).

1. Leave things to chance.......this could of course take a long time and if you don't get out much your chances of finding Mr (or Mrs) Right, are seriously reduced.

2. Have a friend set you up on blind dates with their single friends.......sounds like a bad nightmare!

3. Join a dating agency......this seems to be what most singletons do these days.

So once you have established that you are going to go with the dating agency option, the next step is to decide which one? If you google the subject, ooodles of sites come up. I tell you choosing the right sight takes some hitting and missing too.
All the sites that I have so far looked at require you to register to have yourself put in the picture (it's a bit like selling your house), and you have to pay for the privilege to make contact and read messages from prospective lovers.
OK, so that established, one has to describe oneself....this for me is the tricky bit.

'Wild, crazy mother of three who has no income who cooks lentils and still does cartwheels at the age of 40'......


'Internally beautiful young lady with delightful dependents, loves crafts and living in the country'.......

Oh dear

'Buxom brunette, slim, likes to laugh (and joke around), dances in the living room, OK sings into the hairbrush (sometimes)'......


'Hippyish, home educating, vegetarian, earth mother, makes delicious dandelion quiche and is slightly bonkers'....

You could spend a lifetime planning and writing your profile and it is so important in finding the right person, get it wrong and the potential lover might just run a mile, or you may well attract some total weirdo...oh yes, they are out there!
Last weekend I decided that on line dating wasn't for me and that Mr Right was going to just turn up in my life, two days later, I have joined another website! A week later and I'm off again, having been contacted only by folk in their late 50's (not that there is anything wrong with this but I tend to like folk my own age)!

So it goes on.....thinking for now that there is a grand plan out there and that you never 'find' love when you are looking.

Watch this space!!!!!!!!!!

Saturday, 20 April 2013

Wooohooo, Spring at last!

Ooooh, arrrrhhhh Spring, it's here at last!

Today was the most beautiful day, pure Vitamin D at its best beaming down upon the wet and cold earth at last and all day long too.

Having been hiding away and waiting for warmer weather to appear, it's finally here. At last the time has come to venture out once again and that we did.
I am really feeling the need for adventure at the moment and am determined to make the most of every opportunity to get out and explore this wonderful place in which we live.
For many years now, I have know about a little church that stands alone in a field near Burford. So today, sun shining and snacks packed, I decided to take the children for an adventure. It's taken me about seven years to do this!

The church I finally discovered is called St Oswalds and it sits in a field at a place called Widford right next to Swinbrook near Burford. We parked in the car park of the Church in Swinbrook and followed the footpath through the churchyard across a couple of fields to this amazing little place.

At a first distant glance, the church appeared Victorian. I was basing that judgement on the little bell peak that rose above the hills. As we got closer, it looked much older and once inside it look rather ancient!
The church is tiny (not the smallest I've seen), well in comparison to most churches. But what is quite amazing and mystical is the fact that it doesn't seem to serve any place. The church just stands alone in the middle of a field. Literature within suggests that there may have been a village in the area perhaps wiped out by the plague of the 14th century. Interesting indeed!

The literature also suggested that there were Roman mosaics beneath the flagstone floors, even more amazing! I don't think I can begin to imagine any further and will just take from this place a sense of awe and wonder and enjoy it for what is was, a place of peace, tranquillity and beauty.

A walk back to the car park through the village, was full of talking points and interesting things, thoroughly recommended as an adventure to fill a couple of hours, longer if you stumble upon the pub on the way home!
Oh, we could pass by the ford without a little play! (Well small boy couldn't...note how the girls just stand and stare). xx

Monday, 1 April 2013

The threads that bind

'Let go of the people who cause constant pain; let go of the negativity that colours a room more darkly then any coat of paint. Keep close the people you love, the ones who stay engaged and open to life, who bring joy and peace to the house and garden'.

I'm sooo excited! A teensy weensy display of sun flares and I'm dancing a jig.

This time last year I moved into my current house to make a fresh start.
The first few months were....tricky, to say the least.

The children and I survived a torturous journey worse then the most scary nightmare and then had to fight against the odds to belong in our new hostile surroundings.
Although far beyond the challenges we should have had to endure, we remained true to ourselves and positive and killed the negativity we faced with kindness.

Spring last year brought hostility and loneliness - this year it brings friendship and happiness :-)

I have been joined in my little community by a beautiful and honest family who share my vision, values and positivity. They are friends of old, yet bring with them new hope and new life.

Yesterday, said friends invited us over for Sunday lunch. Easter Sunday lunch. Not easy to prepare when you have five children three of which are under three years of age. What a treat!
I don't often cook roast dinners these days, the effort doesn't seem worth the mess and fiddling about that is involved. I did whip up a large trifle for dessert. Team work - true community spirit to which I am so grateful.

Following the meal we engaged in a discussion about gardening. These friends know all too well that I was born with green fingers and love nothing more then to wallow in beds of muck. They also know how upset I was when last year my circumstances didn't allow me to 'grow my own'. Before I know it I am being given permission to use their already prepared beds for the season.

I am thrilled!!!!

Last year I tried (very unsuccessfully) 'tub gardening'. The enthusiasm was there but I did embarrassingly badly. My garden is surrounded by trees and bushes, no sun = rubbish over damp soil and no crops.
This will be the first year I will have gardened (bed gardened) by myself, so although I have big hopes, I am going to work on  a small scale to ensure some success (I hope).
I am really excited about this (did I already say that?). My neighbours are too busy this year to run the patch themselves so this plan should work well for us all. I can do the main of the work and if my  lovely friends have a spare bit of time, then they can help should they desire. This is true community living!

'Quash negativity with kindness'

Now to plan what to plant and where to plant it :-)